It’s true! Go get it! Yes, your prayers have been answered. And if this is what you’ve been praying for, you will burn in the lake fires of hell.

Infected is a show about the Internet. Therefore, as responsible journalists, it’s incumbent upon Martin and The Gator to cover a major element of the online world: pornography. In this special porn edition, Gator’s favorite adult film star Nicole Sheridan…

…stops by the SargeShack, as does Kory Kupiszewski, a young perv entrepreneur who’s trying to start the iTunes of smut. Watch the episode to learn how you can get a free racy download from his site MovieQuickie! Adults only, please.

Thank you for your continued support,
Internet’s Martin Sargent

Ah, springtime. The season of rebirth and revitalization. And with this episode of Infected, the show enters a new, stronger phase of tremendousness. It has Rickey Kang, a call from Martin’s former online girlfriend Big Missy, an explanation of the whereabouts of little Joey, and several new features like Evil Bert and Gator on the Open Road. Spring has sprung, and you know what that does to young man’s fancy!

Also, I appear very briefly a few times on VH1’s 40 Greatest Internet Stars, airing now. Check your local listings. Of course, they sent me a list of about 50 things they might want me to talk about. I had witty, well-considered things to say for about 40 of them. Guess which 10 they asked me about? Fuck…regardless, it was super fun, and VH1 did a fine job with the show. But why didn’t they select me as one of the greatest Internet stars of all time? Nonsense…

Put on your softest, most non-chafing pajamas, build a fort out of your soiled couch cushions, and grab a bowl of salty snacks such as Fritos or Funyuns, because youÂ’’re invited to The Infected Slumber Party over at The Sarge Shack! Oh, it’Â’ll be a wild night of playing computer games, pillow fights and frank talk about the plight of mankind in the digital age. Just like the slumber parties you went to as a kid! Popular radio personality David Lawrence sleeps over, as does our entertainment reporter Johnny O’Â’Bannion. What follows is unpredictable and in many ways dangerous, so you might want to have your mom wait out in the driveway with the car idling until you settle in.